Hawaii Overrun by Islanders over Spring Break

Ashwin Krishnaswamy, Staff Writer

Over 500 Mercer Island families visited Hawaii over Spring Break. In response, Hawaiians have begun mass protesting in the streets with signs like “Ban the Islanders!”

In the name of equity, the Governor of Hawaii has now set in place tourist limits for Mercer Islanders. Going forward, only 50 Mercer Island families are allowed to visit Hawaii each break. A few guidelines have been set to determine which MI families get to visit Hawaii:

  1. If you visit Hawaii every year, you are not allowed to enter Hawaii ever again. Instead, try broadening your horizons by visiting a different state, or if Mercer Island parents will allow it, another country (no, Canada doesn’t count). 
  2. If life isn’t dangerous enough for you, and you enjoy hazardously slipping down a mountain on two sticks, please go to Whistler instead of Hawaii. Not enough Mercer Island families drive their Teslas to Whistler over break.

If you are eligible to visit Hawaii and would like to begin the application process to vacation there, please fill out the form online, and hopefully, your school counselor will get back to you in the next few years.