Love in the Time of COVID: Makeout Cars, Rated

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Graphic by Lena Hardisty

The Islander has made it a tradition as part of our April Fools’ edition to select our favorite makeout spots. This year, in light of the COVID-19 pandemic, we decided to rate makeout cars, as they seem to be the only option for teens seeking some romance. 

However, The Islander is not encouraging this behavior as it does not follow social distancing guidelines 😉

Stay safe and happy kissing!

School bus:

9/10

The school bus offers a fun and spiritual experience and also comes with a lot of extra space, just in case things escalate. The kids on the bus go smooch smooch smooch.

Ferrari: 

$200,000/$300,000

There’s a lot of horsepower to play around with in this car, however it is really expensive, which may give off the vibe that you are a simp.

Range Rover:

7/10

The Range Rover is ideal for you and your significant other. It comes with complimentary Starbucks drinks, but unfortunately your mom may get in the way of the action.

Tesla:

5/10

Although it is very comfortable, the Tesla is way too quiet and gives little to no privacy because of all that gla$$.

Prius:

0.0000001/10

The Toyota Prius is a repulsive car that you should never reveal to your partner. If you offer to take her for a ride, she probably will escape to another planet in your failed attempt to save this one.